STFU: The Tariffs Edition
Sh*t They F**ked Up
Where even to start on this one? Probably the most obvious STFU yet, with the added bonus of having multiple fuck-ups included in one colossal, enormous, engorged bag of fuck up. Just look at that header image again. Seriously, these clowns may be running out of ups with which to fuck.
Penguin Tariffs
The cutest tariff snafu has to be the fact that T2.0 levied 10% tariffs on the (uninhabited, by humans at least) Heard and McDonald Islands. Being uninhabited is a bit of an issue when trying to level trade, so the islands’ inclusion on the list raised an eyebrow or two. Not a lot of imports or exports here to feed the equations.
When word of the tariffs reached the island’s inhabitants, they immediately took to the “streets” to let Donny know that they were not impressed.
Support Our Troops… With Their Own Tariffs!
In the middle of the Indian Ocean, just south of the equator, lies a tiny a collection of seven small atolls known as the British Indian Ocean Territory (BIOT). The largest of these islands, and the only one that is inhabited, is Diego Garcia, which is home to a joint US/UK base known as Naval Support Facility Diego Garcia. The troops manning this facility provide logistic support to operations in the Indian Ocean and Persian Gulf. So, naturally, T2.0 slapped a 10% tariff on the island. You really can’t make this shit up.
One China
For decades the United States has adopted a diplomatic stance known as the One China Policy. This is a way for the US to be ambiguous towards the concept of Taiwan as a separate nation from China. Basically, the US does not, in any way, formally recognize the government of Taiwan. While it’s a wink and nudge type of situation, it’s been very important in keeping diplomatic relationships with China cool.
Given this history, one would think that the Trump Tariff Taxes on China and Taiwan would be the same. One would be wrong.
Oopsie.
How about that calculation?
At some point in the future there will be history written about these times. It will be a tragicomedy, for sure. I am sure there will those who want to determine the amount of effort that T2.0 put into establishing these tariff rates. I mean, it’s literally all the old bastard has talked about since long before the election, they had to have more than just Concepts of a Plan, right?
Perhaps not:
Now, I took all of this with a grain of salt initially, until a day later when the government confirmed it. Oh, they tried to make it more complicated than it looks, but their obfuscation did not last long.
In sum, the Tariff King didn’t actually use tariffs to calculate his tariffs.
It’s Deadly Serious Though
I snark a lot in these posts because I have to in order to maintain my sanity. It’s so hard to be witness to America literally killing itself. These tariffs are going to have seismic effects on a global scale, and for what reason? To usher in some fantasy of an American Golden Age, where the entire world bows down to our Greatness and sacrifices its own prosperity to prop us up? What kind of madness is that? Over $2 trillion in wealth disappeared on the first full day of Trump’s Tariffs. The stock market fell even further today, the second day. Eventually the market will stabilize.
Maybe.
But the initial damage has been done, and it remains to be seen just how far, and how low, this all will go. All in support of a madman’s insane obsession with tariffs.
There are even some very smart folks who will tell you that these tariffs have nothing to do, at all, with the economy, but are instead a means to further erode our democracy and entrench the Trump autocracy. Just as he has imposed tariffs on whomever he wishes, he can remove them, or create carve-outs. All that has to happen is that these countries and companies need to come to Dear Leader, hat in hand, and kiss the ring. Agree to do what he wishes and perhaps he will relax or remove your burdens. Oh, one other thing… There are no tariffs on Russia. Zero.
Take Care and Stay Strong